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New 'Download' function added to Clips AI vectoring duplicate detection implemented for new jokes Duplicate joke database scanner added; sends detections to Moderators to review 'View Comments' added on the User Menu so you can find all comments on your own jokes 'Followed Jokes' added on User Menu so you can keep track of a joke you've commented on 'Super Vote' - Hold the ⬆️ for 2-4s if you think a joke is REALLY good and it gets double points eMail verification required for sign-up, to help combat enshitifying users IP blocking for confirmed abusers/serial downvoters New 'Download' function added to Clips AI vectoring duplicate detection implemented for new jokes Duplicate joke database scanner added; sends detections to Moderators to review 'View Comments' added on the User Menu so you can find all comments on your own jokes 'Followed Jokes' added on User Menu so you can keep track of a joke you've commented on 'Super Vote' - Hold the ⬆️ for 2-4s if you think a joke is REALLY good and it gets double points eMail verification required for sign-up, to help combat enshitifying users IP blocking for confirmed abusers/serial downvoters
PV 612038
15

Why can't more than one woman play monopoly? Because there is only one iron.

Sexist

2 comments

notbaldbob (1172) · 27-07-2026 1748
15

My mother-in-law bought a talking parrot, but she took it back a week later "This parrot hasn't said anything!" she complained. "I haven't had a fucking chance yet!" replied the parrot.

Sexist

0 comments

notbaldbob (1172) · 21-07-2026 1711
15

Most of the rock legends of the 60s and 70s died young because of their utterly reckless behaviour. Jim Morrison used to snort huge amounts of cocaine. Keith Moon washed down his anti-alcoholism pills with champagne. And Marc Bolan let his missus drive.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 11-06-2026 1552
14

My wife has learning difficulties. She's a woman.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 05-08-2026 1954
12

I have to say, I was disappointed by the efforts made this year to mark International Women's Day. My local strip club only had a couple of foreign birds on, and frankly their tits were nothing to write home about.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 02-08-2026 1242
11

I've put my name down to join the local Feminists Society. Hopefully once they see what an informed and enlightened kind of guy I am, I might get to pump a few of them.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 19-06-2026 1831
11

I went to see Jo Brand. She walked on stage and I shouted "don't get your tits out!"

Sexist

0 comments

Stickyagain 🥈 (1380) · 08-06-2026 1955
10

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? ALL MEN ARE BASTARDS!

Sexist

0 comments

ianwatkins 🥉 (1842) · 20-06-2026 0112
9

Women are like spiders. I don't mind seeing one or two from time to time, but the big hairy ones can fuck right off.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 17-06-2026 0644
9

I've started a women's only gym so they don't have to deal with all the creepy guys hitting on them while they work out. Just ignore the sounds coming from behind the mirrors.

Sexist

0 comments

ianwatkins 🥉 (1842) · 13-06-2026 0514
9

I'll never forget the time there were two girls fighting over me in the street. I called the police. They said "it's not an emergency" I said "it is, the fat bird's winning"

Sexist

0 comments

Stickyagain 🥈 (1380) · 07-06-2026 1554
8

Don't call the all-female removalist company. They'll take half your shit.

Sexist

0 comments

innit (580) · 27-07-2026 1615
7

Why is a woman like a fish? They're both better when you batter them.

Sexist

0 comments

notbaldbob (1172) · 25-07-2026 1035
7

A pussy is a warm,moist beautiful thing. Carried around by a cunt.

Sexist

0 comments

Squeaky (1465) · 11-07-2026 0839
7

What do you call the flesh surrounding a vagina? A woman

Sexist

1 comment

Allobosca 🥇 (2375) · 07-06-2026 1154
7

How many women with PMT does it take to change a lightbulb? It's an irrational number.

Sexist

0 comments

theverydevilhimself 🥇 🥇 🥈 (2186) · 01-06-2026 1658
7

My brother said, "I've just seen your girlfriends number written on a toilet wall. " "So fucking what, " I replied, "how do you think I met her. "

Sexist

0 comments

Kimjongreject (286) · 22-02-2026 0859
5

What's the difference between ironman and ironwoman One's a superhero the other is an order.

Sexist

0 comments

Joeydeaconsbastard (998) · 29-06-2026 1320
5

"You play with that bloody acoustic guitar more than you play with me, " moaned my wife. "Yes, " I replied, "It's better shaped, sounds nicer, and the hole's not as big. "

Sexist

0 comments

Kimjongreject (286) · 15-12-2025 0959
4

Words cannot express how attractive you are . But numbers can 4/10

Sexist

0 comments

Stickyagain 🥈 (1380) · 29-06-2026 1141
4

There is a woman at work, when a man walks up to her and says her hair smells nice. Straight away she walks over to an executive and says she wants to file a sexual harrasment issue. "What's wrong with someone saying your hair smells nice?" he asks. She replies "He's a midget"

Sexist

0 comments

Allobosca 🥇 (2375) · 12-06-2026 1716
4

A man walks into a lift, which already has a very attractive women in it. As the lift is going up, he ask,"Excuse me miss, can I smell your fanny?" "Certainly not!", came her astonsished reply. "Ah! It must be your feet then."

Sexist

0 comments

Allobosca 🥇 (2375) · 12-05-2026 0845
4

The Red Arrows have got their first woman leader. What colour will they be the other 26 days a month?

Sexist

0 comments

ianwatkins 🥉 (1842) · 13-01-2026 1432
4

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
 Trick question – feminists can’t change anything.

Sexist

0 comments

supergalley 🥉 🥉 (1405) · 14-12-2025 0106
4

We were watching a film on the telly when all of a sudden the bloke lifts the woman onto the kitchen top and starts to make love to her, "Yeah, right, " said the wife, " as if that happens. " "I totally agree, " I replied, "the only thing that gets fucked in our kitchen is the food. "

Sexist

0 comments

Kimjongreject (286) · 03-12-2025 1827
3

"I'm thinking about trading in the old dishwasher for a newer model." "What's wrong with the old one?" "She's getting a bit saggy."

Sexist

0 comments

Hengist (472) · 04-07-2026 1050
3

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Let the bitch cook in the dark

Sexist

0 comments

Allobosca 🥇 (2375) · 25-05-2026 1902
3

When it comes to oral sex women are so much luckier than men. They can suck a dick and still doomscroll on their phones.

Sexist

0 comments

ianwatkins 🥉 (1842) · 05-02-2026 0121
2

All these 304s with fake tits and I'm thinking "Inflate to 80 PSI"

Sexist

0 comments

innit (580) · 09-07-2026 1011
2

"My body is like a temple, " said my sister. "Are you sure you don't mean a Mosque with the amount of Muslims you've had in it?" I replied.

Sexist

0 comments

Kimjongreject (286) · 14-12-2025 1538
1

How can you tell if its your turn to do the washing up? Look down your trousers and if you've got a dick it isn't your turn.

Sexist

0 comments

supergalley 🥉 🥉 (1405) · 02-12-2025 0058
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