| 20 |
27-07-2026 06:20 |
Common English mistakes:
Using they're instead of their.
Using an apostrophe
|
| 20 |
26-07-2026 07:59 |
I refused to believe I was gay and dyslexic.
I was in Daniel.
|
| 18 |
27-07-2026 19:42 |
I won first place in a political correctness competition the weekend...
Thoug
|
| 18 |
25-07-2026 10:31 |
My dog bit a black guy the other day so the police told me to have him chipped.
|
| 17 |
23-07-2026 05:35 |
"So how long are you in for?" I asked my new cellmate.
"Just a couple of minute
|
| 16 |
27-07-2026 06:28 |
A huge article just appeared featuring Dracula's lifestyle in Daily Mail.
And y
|
| 16 |
23-07-2026 15:27 |
I can't believe my wife has kicked me out just for measuring my penis.
Just f
|
| 16 |
10-07-2026 09:13 |
I think it’s pretty cool how
the Chinese made a language entirely out of tattoo
|
| 15 |
27-07-2026 17:48 |
Why can't more than one woman play monopoly?
Because there is only one iron.
|
| 15 |
26-07-2026 07:43 |
A man was savagely attacked at The Teddy Bear's Picnic.
His condition is said t
|
| 15 |
25-07-2026 13:35 |
The first thing I look for in a woman is intelligence.
Because if she doesn't h
|
| 15 |
24-07-2026 21:36 |
I saw a white girl down town the other day and she had 5 black kids!
I thought
|
| 15 |
21-07-2026 17:11 |
My mother-in-law bought a talking parrot, but she took it back a week later
"Th
|
| 15 |
20-07-2026 06:07 |
I just saw a black guy running down the road with a Cape on
I shouted, "Are you
|
| 15 |
17-07-2026 07:28 |
Apparently, North Korea now has a missile that can hit New York, which is a bit
|
| 14 |
28-07-2026 06:35 |
'Alpacin Caffeine shampoo, German engineering for your hair'
Anyone else conc
|
| 14 |
27-07-2026 17:46 |
I walked into work this morning and my boss told me to have good day.
So I tu
|
| 14 |
26-07-2026 16:54 |
During sex with the wife, I suddenly stopped and didn't move.
She said, "What
|
| 14 |
26-07-2026 13:12 |
Marriage, because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.
|
| 14 |
26-07-2026 11:18 |
A sign above the door where I work says
"Once you go black you never come back
|
| 13 |
21-07-2026 06:16 |
I've heard that supermarkets secretly waft the smell of their .bakery around the
|
| 13 |
16-07-2026 13:53 |
My mate went to get a tattoo of an Indian on his back.
Half way through he sai
|
| 13 |
16-07-2026 13:48 |
I've been watching so much porn lately,
I've started spitting on my front door
|
| 13 |
15-07-2026 07:14 |
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Doorbell repairman.
|
| 13 |
10-07-2026 10:54 |
I had a goldfish that could breakdance on the carpet.
Only for like 20 seconds.
|
| 12 |
24-07-2026 21:20 |
A teacher says to her class, "can anyone give me a .sentence with the word dande
|
| 12 |
23-07-2026 05:31 |
A Muslim lady was denied entrance into McDonalds
today until she removes her hi
|
| 12 |
22-07-2026 05:57 |
I call my wife Bambi.
She thinks its because she's cute with big brown eyes.
|
| 12 |
17-07-2026 08:18 |
I was sitting in the pub doing a Crossword when I turned to my Scottish mate and
|
| 12 |
16-07-2026 05:37 |
As I pointed the gun at my wife’s face I said, “Any last words?”
Three hours
|
| 12 |
15-07-2026 05:33 |
Simply put a % sign after your age to see how dead you are.
|
| 12 |
10-07-2026 10:50 |
The death penalty for terrorists is being discussed in parliament and the house
|
| 11 |
27-07-2026 18:34 |
Did you know that anal sex is still illegal in Iceland?
Not sure if its the s
|
| 11 |
26-07-2026 17:07 |
If you refuse to pay your TV licence, you can be sent to prison.
Where, ironi
|
| 11 |
24-07-2026 21:27 |
I've just become the leap frog world record holder
On the down side I'm now ban
|
| 11 |
20-07-2026 06:04 |
Scientists in China have successfully cloned two macaque monkeys
It's quite imp
|
| 11 |
16-07-2026 09:52 |
I've just bought myself a new motor and its going to be a proper fanny magnet.
|
| 11 |
10-07-2026 09:17 |
I went to a fetish restaurant last night.
I got toed in the hole.
|
| 11 |
10-07-2026 09:11 |
My wife found out I'd been masturbating to some strange types of porn.
She sa
|
| 10 |
25-07-2026 13:37 |
What's red and keeps a cunt warm?
A Liverpool scarf.
|
| 10 |
24-07-2026 10:07 |
I introduced my new black girlfriend to my slightly deaf grandfather.
"She's
|
| 10 |
23-07-2026 19:02 |
My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer and the doctor said she had to have a d
|
| 10 |
22-07-2026 16:52 |
My wife is in hospital after being beaten up for using the 'N' word.
Next time
|
| 10 |
21-07-2026 17:08 |
Rowan Atkinson's next film role is to play a comical character who is unable to
|
| 10 |
19-07-2026 11:02 |
can't believe the number of fucking foreigners coming to live in this country.
|
| 10 |
17-07-2026 08:05 |
Its always flattering when someone says "You've got a nice bum"
Except when you
|
| 10 |
16-07-2026 14:28 |
I left the house this morning to be greeted by a huge, wet dogshit in the middle
|
| 10 |
15-07-2026 13:32 |
Just found out that cock fighting is done with chickens.....
That was 8 month
|
| 10 |
10-07-2026 10:09 |
Winston goes to church and the vicar says "What's wrong my son?"
Winston says "
|
| 10 |
07-07-2026 21:40 |
What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I don’t know, and I don’t
|
| 10 |
05-07-2026 08:26 |
I hate it when you walk into a room and totally forget why you went in there.
|
| 10 |
04-07-2026 13:14 |
Growing up with a dyslexic father had its advantages.
Whenever he caught me sw
|
| 9 |
27-07-2026 18:31 |
Today 64 muslims died in Bradford,
it was not a terrorist attack.
A bunk bed
|
| 9 |
27-07-2026 06:34 |
I used to go out with an English teacher,
but she dumped me. She didn't approv
|
| 9 |
26-07-2026 07:41 |
There are no bad dogs, just bad cooks.
~Old Korean proverb.
|
| 9 |
24-07-2026 05:39 |
I've been dating a homeless girl for a while now, it's going really well.
I'm
|
| 9 |
23-07-2026 18:09 |
I went to the best ever burger van today,
It was so good, it had 4 Michelin tyr
|
| 9 |
23-07-2026 15:22 |
"Dad, on my way home from school I saw Santa beating a Pakistani man up outside
|
| 9 |
22-07-2026 16:43 |
My wife has just given birth to a baby boy...
10 pounds.
Or nearest offer.
I
|
| 9 |
15-07-2026 10:23 |
We were on a plane and the guy next to us started to be sick, so I got a paper b
|
| 9 |
10-07-2026 10:46 |
So much has changed since my girlfriend told me we’re having a baby.
For insta
|
| 9 |
05-07-2026 23:16 |
I was in a taxi today and the driver said "I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobod
|
| 9 |
05-07-2026 11:52 |
I was so ugly as a child that the local pedo used to eat his own sweets.
|
| 9 |
03-07-2026 07:32 |
A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over a
|
| 8 |
27-07-2026 19:39 |
When I was involved in a three car pile up recently, I managed to escape with a
|
| 8 |
25-07-2026 10:45 |
The only time my wife will ever scream "DEEPER, DEEPER" is when they are loweri
|
| 8 |
24-07-2026 07:10 |
If there was a competition for saggy tits, my wife would beat everyone.
In fa
|
| 8 |
24-07-2026 05:37 |
My doctor said I don't eat enough vegetables.
So I've started dating a spastic
|
| 8 |
23-07-2026 05:33 |
Wide scale protests are taking place all over Bradford
tonight after the price
|
| 8 |
22-07-2026 05:59 |
The teacher was asking her class what their fathers did.
"My dad runs the priso
|
| 8 |
22-07-2026 05:55 |
[Meme]
meme
|
| 8 |
21-07-2026 06:08 |
Have you noticed how many F1 drivers have names linked to Scottish towns?
Sti
|
| 8 |
20-07-2026 15:48 |
If a girl fucks more than 10 guys in a year she's called a slut.
But if a bloke
|
| 8 |
20-07-2026 15:41 |
If Islam is the religion of peace,
then homeopathy is the medicine of science.
|
| 8 |
19-07-2026 18:58 |
I've just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman
It's very rewarding
|
| 8 |
19-07-2026 18:36 |
During meditation, a monk asks his master
“Master. If a man shaves his arse, is
|
| 8 |
19-07-2026 10:48 |
My current job application asked me if I suffered from any disabilities, so I pu
|
| 8 |
18-07-2026 14:55 |
I don't like Rap music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do.
And for the
|
| 8 |
16-07-2026 09:57 |
It must be tough for someone who suffers from Bulimia and OCD. Eating alphabety
|
| 8 |
13-07-2026 05:42 |
I walked into the lounge to find my wife breast feeding our son.
"How long do
|
| 7 |
28-07-2026 06:38 |
I saw a homeless couple making out
I shouted out "For fucks sake get a box".
|
| 7 |
25-07-2026 10:38 |
Me and the wife are having what is known as Olympic sex...
It happens once ever
|
| 7 |
25-07-2026 10:35 |
Why is a woman like a fish?
They're both better when you batter them.
|
| 7 |
21-07-2026 00:08 |
I've been seeing this girl, and she said she doesn't give blow jobs in the first
|
| 7 |
20-07-2026 15:44 |
I beat my wife at dominos the other night.
She needs to learn that I choose the
|
| 7 |
19-07-2026 09:46 |
I just caught my foreskin in my zip.
That's the last time I wear these zip up
|
| 7 |
17-07-2026 11:25 |
Last night I reached for my liquid Viagra and accidentally swigged from a bottle
|
| 7 |
14-07-2026 18:30 |
I remember when I was a kid, I'd run out of the house when I heard Mr. Whippy co
|
| 7 |
13-07-2026 18:33 |
Not sure if I should be concerned, but I've just found my wife's wank sock.
|
| 7 |
12-07-2026 21:16 |
I walked into a car showroom last night.
I said to the salesman, "My wife would
|
| 7 |
06-07-2026 17:20 |
This blind man with a beautiful woman stopped me in the street and said.
"Exc
|
| 7 |
03-07-2026 07:52 |
To the Person who stole my glasses. I will find you.
I have contacts...
|
| 6 |
23-07-2026 21:35 |
I was walking down the street the other day and I saw .these two blind blokes sq
|
| 6 |
21-07-2026 06:02 |
Russia has just dropped a nuclear bomb on Ethiopia.
1 million died in the blast
|
| 6 |
18-07-2026 09:25 |
The teacher says to little Johnny, "If you had twelve Mars bars, of which Sanjee
|
| 6 |
16-07-2026 05:48 |
What's fat, ginger and pregnant?
Nothing.
|
| 6 |
16-07-2026 05:46 |
I have a condition that makes me eat when I can’t sleep.
It’s called insom-no
|
| 6 |
14-07-2026 14:55 |
Back when I was a kid, there was no internet.
So people would sometimes have t
|
| 6 |
14-07-2026 06:08 |
I met a beautiful girl down at the park today.
Sparks flew, she fell at my fe
|
| 6 |
12-07-2026 21:32 |
The Police just been to my door holding a picture of my Wife
They said "Is th
|
| 6 |
10-07-2026 16:44 |
I got a job recently, in the sex industry.
The pay isn't too good, but at leas
|
| 6 |
10-07-2026 12:45 |
Jesus is at the last supper and takes the bread, blesses it, and says,
"Take th
|
| 6 |
07-07-2026 21:42 |
My Red Indian mate Brown Bear introduced me to his wife last night....
"This is
|
| 6 |
04-07-2026 14:37 |
[Meme]
meme
|
| 5 |
04-08-2026 05:41 |
They have done an autopsy to find out what was in the middle of Liddle.
|
| 5 |
03-08-2026 22:02 |
Jimmy Croaked it.
|
| 5 |
28-07-2026 06:31 |
I vividly recall my Grandfather and I digging a hole in the back garden and it f
|
| 5 |
25-07-2026 10:40 |
Show me a man who calls himself a vegan
and I'll show you a man who's trying t
|
| 5 |
18-07-2026 15:19 |
[Meme]
meme
|
| 5 |
18-07-2026 14:58 |
I was walking down the street with my wife earlier when she accused me of being
|
| 5 |
14-07-2026 18:25 |
Black people use hot sauce on everything because they have developed a taste for
|
| 5 |
13-07-2026 14:04 |
Childproof your house all you want.
They still fucking get in.
|
| 5 |
07-07-2026 21:38 |
My wife screamed, "You've got no feelings," and stormed out the house.
She's be
|
| 5 |
04-07-2026 17:54 |
I read an article earlier that said it actually takes three sheep to make one ju
|
| 4 |
18-07-2026 09:19 |
Gutted! My wife just left me because I never put the toilet seat down.
To be
|
| 4 |
17-07-2026 20:47 |
The rabbi of a London synagogue who was taken hostage the other day has describe
|
| 4 |
16-07-2026 14:01 |
This maths test can predict your favourite film. Not sure how it works but it do
|
| 4 |
12-07-2026 21:20 |
Always turn electrical equipment off at night other than two things
Refrigera
|
| 4 |
27-06-2026 21:21 |
Just watching the England game, I was mistakenly cheering on Panama as they wer
|
| 2 |
04-07-2026 17:14 |
If the entire word “Bootylicious” can easily be read across your arse.
It’s p
|
| 2 |
04-07-2026 16:47 |
Don't be ashamed of yourself.
That's your parents' job.
|
| 2 |
04-07-2026 16:41 |
After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me, 'Maybe life isn't for everyo
|
| 2 |
04-07-2026 14:42 |
A famous heart surgeon died and everyone was gathered at his funeral. A coffin w
|
| 2 |
04-07-2026 13:10 |
I was in a restaurant earlier when a group of electricians came in.
The waiter
|
