Someone once called me illiterate. Bollocks. My folks had been married three years when they had me.
Silly theverydevilhimself 🥉 🥇 (4077) · 04-10-2026 1058Went to see the doctor to tell him I have these urges to wear 1970s trousers. He asked how often I get these urges. So I told him "Oh it only flares up now and again".
Silly Joeydeaconsbastard 🥈 (1220) · 22-10-2026 2114I dropped an egg onto a concrete floor and it didn't even crack. That's because concrete is really hard.
Silly Stallion (1721) · 13-10-2026 1158Was chatting to a chap from the Balkans yesterday, strangely he stabbed me and stole my wallet. Police are still on the search for Monty Negro
Silly Dogpad (140) · 14-10-2026 1534I always fill my blow-up dolls with propane. Regards, D Trotter, Peckham
Went out with my bell-bottoms on the heavens opened and started to piss down. I'm fucking ringing now.
Silly Joeydeaconsbastard 🥈 (1220) · 28-09-2026 1858I bought a bottle of Dr Watson's Patented Constipation Remedy. Misread the instructions, and ended up doing half a bottle instead of half a teaspoonful, half an hour before I embarked on an important train journey in a carriage full of vicars. Anyway, turns out the stuff had no effect on me and the journey concluded without incident. No shit, sheer luck...
Silly › Puns Adjacent Puns Adjacent theverydevilhimself 🥉 🥇 (4077) · 02-10-2026 2221Truth is like an ancient mirror. It reveals everything, except why the nearest cabbage won't make eye contact.
Silly › Absurd Absurd innit 🥈 (1386) · 20-10-2026 2011Met police searching for suspect after man shot near Royal Artillery barracks. That's no kind of place to be discharging firearms.
Silly › Absurd Absurd theverydevilhimself 🥉 🥇 (4077) · 23-10-2026 1435